Hi there girls. Ok, so are we all in agreement that since this is just for the five of us, it doesn't have to be Pulitzer-prize winning writing? I'll do my best, but thought I'd add this little disclaimer on just in case.
So here it is Friday night and I'm getting ready to head to a movie with my sister and her roommate. I have now been here a month which is kind of hard to beleive, although I am just beginning to feel like I live here. I think it has something to with the fact that I lived at my sister's for 2+ weeks and although I'm now in my own flat, I still don't have any furniture until my dad comes up at the end of the month. I am really loving my place though, my roommates are so great and nice so that's made everything that much easier/nicer. Still working at CPK and I have to say that I think that working there might be part of the reason that I'm not having quite the experience I had hoped for as of right now. I do not regret that I moved here for a minute, you all know that this is what I have wanted to do for 9 years now. But not gonna lie, it's a lot harder than I thought it would be. I work with some nice people, but so far, hasn't gone anywhere but 'work friends' yet. I rhink I'm just a little frustruated because I want so much to be doing something worthwhile and helpful to others, but here I am waiting tables. Anyone else find it funny that I'm looking for a non profit or teaching job, something that is there to help others and what our country is supposedly in dire need of, having such a shortage of teachers, yet it's one of the toughest sectors to break into. I just don't get it...I have to say I think one of the things that frustruates me the most though is that I know I'm not doing all that I can to find a job that I want. My dad told me the other day, in an attempt to make me put things in perspective, that I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself and get on with it. He was right too. Instead of just being thankful that I had the past 7 months in Europe, I just keep wishing I was there. I miss London more and more everyday, and I know that that's holding me back from 'getting on with it.' I just miss everything about Europe, and most of all, the people. I feel very alone here which is something that I am not used to. I don't think that I've ever been in this position, but I suppose this will be good for me in the end. Nothing worthwhile is easy. I just sometimes worry that I'll lose a part of myself that I found while away and that scares me the most because more than anything, the time abroad really put me in perspective to myself, if that makes any sense at all.
Wow sorry to jsut go on and on about this, but it really does help to write it and I don't know who else I would say this to. Don't start worrying though, I really am fine and doing what I should/want to be doing at this point. If I wasn't in NY, I know I would always regret that, and if there's another thing that I want to carry over from last year, it's the NO REGRETS attitude. I also need to remember that this is a pattern with me, college was sort of like this at first, as was London. Funny how that you always remember the good about your previous life when in a new situation. Because I can tell you, I haven't been thinking about trudging through the rain looking at the 100th sketchiest flat, or the 45th day in a row of lugging that damned backpack up another hill just to realize that we've missed the train...again. Ha I wrote that to say that things sometimes sucked un Europe too to throw some perspective on the situation, but now I'm sitting here laughing and smiling remembering those times. (And the story of Whit, Chels, and Gina missing like 90 trains in one day)
Ok girls it's time for me to go. Tomorrow's my day off, then it's a double for me on Sunday, Monday Tuesday, and opening Wednesday, thursday and Friday. Yes that's right, 9 shifts in 6 days. Probaly won't be around much next week, but hopefully will make enough money to ease up on the restaurant and really search for other jobs the following week. I did apply to a few jobs tonight though, a lot in the education field, so keep your fingers crossed! I love you girls and hope you're all doing well.
Blog to you soon,
Sarah
So here it is Friday night and I'm getting ready to head to a movie with my sister and her roommate. I have now been here a month which is kind of hard to beleive, although I am just beginning to feel like I live here. I think it has something to with the fact that I lived at my sister's for 2+ weeks and although I'm now in my own flat, I still don't have any furniture until my dad comes up at the end of the month. I am really loving my place though, my roommates are so great and nice so that's made everything that much easier/nicer. Still working at CPK and I have to say that I think that working there might be part of the reason that I'm not having quite the experience I had hoped for as of right now. I do not regret that I moved here for a minute, you all know that this is what I have wanted to do for 9 years now. But not gonna lie, it's a lot harder than I thought it would be. I work with some nice people, but so far, hasn't gone anywhere but 'work friends' yet. I rhink I'm just a little frustruated because I want so much to be doing something worthwhile and helpful to others, but here I am waiting tables. Anyone else find it funny that I'm looking for a non profit or teaching job, something that is there to help others and what our country is supposedly in dire need of, having such a shortage of teachers, yet it's one of the toughest sectors to break into. I just don't get it...I have to say I think one of the things that frustruates me the most though is that I know I'm not doing all that I can to find a job that I want. My dad told me the other day, in an attempt to make me put things in perspective, that I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself and get on with it. He was right too. Instead of just being thankful that I had the past 7 months in Europe, I just keep wishing I was there. I miss London more and more everyday, and I know that that's holding me back from 'getting on with it.' I just miss everything about Europe, and most of all, the people. I feel very alone here which is something that I am not used to. I don't think that I've ever been in this position, but I suppose this will be good for me in the end. Nothing worthwhile is easy. I just sometimes worry that I'll lose a part of myself that I found while away and that scares me the most because more than anything, the time abroad really put me in perspective to myself, if that makes any sense at all.
Wow sorry to jsut go on and on about this, but it really does help to write it and I don't know who else I would say this to. Don't start worrying though, I really am fine and doing what I should/want to be doing at this point. If I wasn't in NY, I know I would always regret that, and if there's another thing that I want to carry over from last year, it's the NO REGRETS attitude. I also need to remember that this is a pattern with me, college was sort of like this at first, as was London. Funny how that you always remember the good about your previous life when in a new situation. Because I can tell you, I haven't been thinking about trudging through the rain looking at the 100th sketchiest flat, or the 45th day in a row of lugging that damned backpack up another hill just to realize that we've missed the train...again. Ha I wrote that to say that things sometimes sucked un Europe too to throw some perspective on the situation, but now I'm sitting here laughing and smiling remembering those times. (And the story of Whit, Chels, and Gina missing like 90 trains in one day)
Ok girls it's time for me to go. Tomorrow's my day off, then it's a double for me on Sunday, Monday Tuesday, and opening Wednesday, thursday and Friday. Yes that's right, 9 shifts in 6 days. Probaly won't be around much next week, but hopefully will make enough money to ease up on the restaurant and really search for other jobs the following week. I did apply to a few jobs tonight though, a lot in the education field, so keep your fingers crossed! I love you girls and hope you're all doing well.
Blog to you soon,
Sarah
posted by Sarah Zimmerman at 3:21 PM
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